Pie, Pie My Darling

I've been reading Pie Any Means Necessary: The Biotic Baking Brigade Cookbook which I got through my Friends of AK Press deal.  Despite the title, this is not a cookbook, it's a history book and activist guideline for how to cut people down to size with a well-timed pie to the face.  As someone who has spent almost his entire life pranking people, I appreciate it as those in power deserve to be pied every once in a while.  (The fact is, many of them need something even more extreme as the decisions they make often effect people's lives in negative ways and I'm a firm believer in an eye for an eye.)

Politicians, newscasters, actors -- nobody is immune from these antics.  To read the first-hand accounts of the pie tossers and how they get by security is nothing short of amazing.  Reading the reasons why they do it makes me think their targets should be thankful they came armed only with pies and an agenda and not a Luger.  From what I see, the people pied deserve it.  When you press for clearcutting forests or want states to be get rid of libraries and give those tax dollars to businesses instead, a face full of cream is about the best you can wish for.

The Middle East right now is a victim of threat by example.  Egypt set the example.  Other people have caught the fever and have started protesting, marching through the streets with fists raised.  In a sense, they have the same spirit as people like the Biotic Baking Brigade.  Their actions aren't as directed, but the desire to show those in power that their time has come is the same.  Reading this book (which I have not yet finished), is a good reminder of the importance of protest and pranks.  They can cause change, and if they don't, they still make you feel better.  You can either complain about your leaders or oust them.  Remember: if the only way an leader can justify itself (be it human or an agency of humans) is by force, it is no real leader and deserves to be dismantled.  Just because someone or something has a title doesn't mean it deserves it.  What it does deserve is a pie smack dab in its face.

A word of warning, though.  As I was reading the book I came across this disturbing essay title: Menstrual Pies!  Just seeing the title reminded me of a video I saw a few years ago, and the stomach churning feeling I got from it.  The essay is not what it seems, so I would not skip over it if you are reading the book, and nor would I put the book back on the shelf if you are thumbing through it at your local bookseller. 

If  you're in Wisconsin today, you know how nice it would feel to lob one of those pies at your union-hating Republican servants.  If you're in Libya, you may want a pie but probably need bullets.  Either way, the spirit of freedom and fairness is alive and well.  It is up to those who want such things to take them.  Your leaders won't give them to you, they must be snatched away from them.  This book reminds you that such a thing is possible.  Nobody is safe, and there are no exemptions.  It's a bit refreshing, quite honestly, like a an custard pie to face.